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Saturday, June 9, 2012

Mama Guilt

OK ladies, I want to talk about something serious today.

Mama guilt.
If you know what I'm talking about then you've been a mom for longer than 2 days. If you don't, then you're probably not a mom LOL!

For those that don't know what Mama guilt is, I'll explain. Mama guilt (as defined by yours truly ;) ) is the feeling that a mama gets that makes her feel like the worst mother in the world! What causes this feeling? It can be anything from not breastfeeding (yes guys, moms that have a desire to breastfeed feel extreme guilt if they are unable to) to wanting/needing to go on vacation without the kids (and for me this would include going to the store by myself! LOL)
 It, sadly, can also come from other moms! You know what I'm talking about ladies. When you make a decision (whether it be choosing NOT to breastfeed, working outside the home or whichever form of education you choose for your children) that another mom doesn't agree with and they give you that look. The look that says, "Well aren't you selfish!"
It can also come from a mom who doesn't intend to cast judgement upon another mom, but that is passionate about her choices. I have been guilty of this myself. And I feel horrible that I have caused a fellow mom to doubt her choices.
There are several blogs that I follow and look to for encouragement, and these women are very passionate about what they are writing. As a fellow writer, I understand that :)
But I read something today on a blog (and I will paraphrase) that said that if a mom chooses to have a career and work outside the home she is selling her children's souls. Because she is choosing money and satisfaction over raising her children herself. It also went on to say that when, said mom, faces God on judgment day; she would tell Him her accomplishments and He would admonish her that it came at the cost of her children's souls.
Talk about Mama guilt!!
Yes, I am planning to homeschool my children, but in the back of my mind I hope to go back to school one day.
I understand that this blogger was trying to encourage women to take their roles as "keepers of the home" (Titus 2:3-5) seriously, but she completely alienated those who also feel a calling to work.

I 'm not here today to decide whether she is right or wrong, and I won't try to persuade you otherwise. I only want to say that as moms we have got to stop making each other feel bad about our parenting choices!
You do what you feel (and have prayed about) is right for your family, and I'll do what I feel lead for mine! We were all created different with different talents and desires and our parenting choices will reflect that.
I also want to say that (most) choices are not permanent. So my choice to homeschool next year, is exactly that. To homeschool next year! Will I homeschool the next year? Who knows?! We may get into it and decide that we love it and couldn't imagine doing it any other way...or...I may get into it and say "What was I thinking?!" And would then PRAY about it and do something different the next year.

I guess what I'm getting at is, pray about the choices you make for your family. And then be proud of them! And of yourself!! You are a great mom, so get rid of the guilt and tell the devil what he can do with it!
Mrs. B

Monday, June 4, 2012

Not Backing Down!

The enemy has been on my case lately. He's practically made camp on my back porch. Whispering doubts in my ear to the point that the wall that I have been building was down. And then he attacked, loud and clear! And sadly, he used someone else's words to do it. Whether this person knew it or not, Satan was using him/her to break my spirit...and it worked.
By yesterday, the enemy's taunts were ringing in my ears and by this morning my reserve was gone. I was ready to be normal.
So I woke up this morning and begged God to give me....something. I didn't even know what to pray for. I was craving some sort of encouragement. I needed to know that what I have been doing is the right thing. Or would it matter if I slipped back in to being "normal"? I needed to hear from Him. But I got nothing...He was silent.
Discouraged, I got up, put on a pair of jean,s and let the boys watch whatever they wanted. This, to some, may not be a huge deal and to most probably sounds very trivial. But in our home this was pretty big.
Then I checked my facebook, and I found these words of encouragement from my wonderful husband ,

"I want you to know how proud I am to be married to such a Godly woman, a woman who can stand up for what she believes in, and a great mother and wife who shines Gods light in our home. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!"

And this from my pastor:
When you become tired and weary in the work of the Lord remember, "for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up." Galatians 6:9

I prayed a tearful thanksgiving to my Lord for using these men to lift me up when I was giving up.
So to the devil I say, "Go away! You are not welcome here! In the name of Jesus, you will leave my house not to return! I will keep being the woman God has called me to be. I will keep His standards for myself and my children, not yours or this worlds!"

On a side note, if anyone would like to know what I have decided in regard to the superhero issue. Bubba (new alias!) will be phasing out of secular superheros, and will be encouraged to look up to Bibleman and real life heroes. I am just not comfortable with him looking up to characters that go against God's standards.

Mrs. B

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Comment Section Changes

So after some harassing comments from someone "anonymous". I have changed it to where you must be a registered user. If you have any questions on how to do this, please contact me through facebook. I am sorry that this has changed, but I will not allow me or my family to be harassed by someone that isn't brave enough to use their own name.
Mrs. B